A Big Leap
10 years ago
Ever tried tasting food with your feet?
That’s how butterflies find
things sweet
Brightly coloured, they have four wings
And through their life they’re four different
things
They drink the nectar from pretty flowers
That bloom so bright after spring showers
They flutter by gracefully in yellow, blue or green
The prettiest insects you’ve ever seen
This is a story that’s often been told Of Peter Pan – the boy who never grows old Wendy, Michael and John meet one night A boy in green and a fairy so light. Peter Pan and Tinker Bell are they Who fly the kids up, up and away To Neverland, a place so fair With many creatures fine and rare. But pirates roam all over this land Their Captain has a hook for a hand That was eaten up by a mean, green croc With a clock in his tummy that goes Tick Tock Tinker Bell flies them through the land so wide Captain Hook catches them and has them all tied The kids cry for help, but Tinker gets away She quickly calls Peter to come save the day. With a swish of his sword and a push in the water, Peter Pan feeds Hook to the clock-throated crocker! Now that you know what happened that day,
So the Rickshaw driver dream that AM had seems to have been a fleeting one... He woke up in the middle of the night just to announce that he's now thinking of being an Actor again! Hmm.. How about that?
Labels: career choices, kids
So AM now wants to be a rickshaw driver. How cool is that?! This is making IM want to be a tractor driver. I've been spending many-a-morning trying to convince AM that even rickshaw drivers need to go to school ... at least to be able to read street names ;)
Labels: career choices, kids
We spent a lovely Sunday morning at the beach. The weather was just right. Not rainy. Lots of clouds. Nice and breezy. High tide. Perfect setting for some introspection. We dug holes, looked for sea shells, ran into the water and brought some back in a pail, made a castle, broke it, made it again, covered our feet with sand, watched airplanes, watched people play cricket, watched kids frolic with the waves, followed an insect till it disappeared in the sand, and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves till it was finally time to drag ourselves home!
What's this got to do with life lessons, you ask? Well... here's how I put the whole sea shells experience into a different perspective.
We go through different stages in our lives... when we're young we're combing the beach for sea shells, frantically looking for opportunities, filling our kitty with whatever we can find. As time goes on, you get a little picky and choosy, you have the freedom to pick only the best. Soon you're be walking along with a bag full of sea shells, satisfied with what you've collected, a child skipping along by your side. He stops, tugs at your shirt and points at a few shells..."Mom, look there's a good one!", you pick some, you kick some. You enjoy the breeze though your hair, watch the kids beaming with the joy of having had a great morning, and with a sigh of satisfaction and a smile of achievement, you go home!
So finally, Mumbai is Sea Linked! :)
What a first day for it though. Major traffic jams. People took 3 hours to get back from town to suburbs in the evening. Rather crazy I say! But you know what's crazier? Its the name game that the politicians are playing! One guy says lets call it the Rajiv Gandhi Setu... so immediately the other has to oppose and say Oh no! lets name it after Veer Savarkar! Well, guys.... don't you have anything better to do?!? Are you the parents of this bridge? I mean what is wrong with calling it the Bandra Worli Sea Link? Perfectly sound name, if you ask me! Why really waste time? Plus, calling it a person's name will only mean that if all goes well and people do cross it in 7 minutes, yada yada.. they will say "Oh this Rajiv Gandhi bridge is a great boon to the city, I say!" But if traffic snags are caused due to it, poor Rajiv Gandhi will get blamed... for something he is not even responsible for! (well... I guess, politicians must be used to that, though!) With people saying something like "Chhya men, this Rajiv Gandhi bridge has become a pain in the @$$, men!"
So yeah, I would say, Mr. Politicians, please can you get back to doing some good for the country (guffaw!!), rather than fighting like children? Please? Please?
And we're back! What a trip! Its quite an experience traveling with toddlers!! Two weeks passed in a flash.
The first week was all about the kids getting over jet lag, CN Towers in Toronto (scary glass floor on the 114th floor.. or was it 147th?!), meeting cousins after ages, Toronto Zoo, Sightseeing with the whole family (the last time this happened was 17 years ago), Niagara falls and Maid of the Mist, and a lovely graduation ceremony in Buffalo.
Then the magic began. A week at Walt Disney World. They don't call it the happiest place in the world for nothing! (Wait, have they heard the tantrums of children threatening to reach unbelievable decibel levels if not immediately provided with the most insignificant and highly overpriced toy/tattoo/face paint/character suit/sweet stuff/you name it).
Anyway... we had a great place to stay at for the week, a lovely villa at the Sheraton Vistana Resort, 10 minutes away from WDW and all the food places on our list. Two thumbs-upskis for this place!! Our villa was in Fountains I - 1362. Our rental car from National came with one of the biggest boons of modern technology - a GPS. All we had to do was tell her where we wanted to go and she'd talk us through the whole route... (AM now loves to say "Keep left"). Here's who all we had in our party... there was us four GM, AM (Age:4), IM (Age:2), and me, and then there was them three SR, MR and their son RR (Age:5.5). The three boys went crazy!!!
Magic Kingdom was awe-inspiring. Its good that we had bought our tickets (5-day Magic Your Way with Park Hopper and Water Park fun and more) in advance (thanks to Undercovertourist.com). Its a long way from the parking lot, via monorail, to the entrance of Magic Kingdom. We had reserved a character breakfast at Crystal Palace. The kids loved meeting Eeyore, Piglet, Pooh and Tigger; and eat Mickey Mouse shaped waffles. Maybe I loved it more than the kids!! AM had his own kid-proof digital camera, so we got some fun midget-eye-view shots.
Buzz Lightyear's Space Ranger Spin was a treat for AM and I was surprised how well IM sat throught it completely mesmerised. We met Buzz right outside this ride, and AM had to buy the Buzz costume to get into the whole spirit of things. He got pictures with Buzz, and many bewildered looks and comments from people who couldn't believe that he was wearing this full body suit in 100 degree weather.
AM and GM then went on the Indy Speedway ride, where AM "drove" the car, while IM and I sat under a tree and had a Mickey shaped ice-cream! (Man, the amount of money they make in the name of the mouse is just amazing).
AM got his face painted.. he was Tiger Lightyear for an hour before the paint made his face itch.
IM and I went on Goofy's Barnstormer, a beginner roller-coater. He was rather good throughout the ride. AM and GM spent time in Minnie's Townhouse and Donald's Boat. AM and IM both loved the kitchen in Minnie's house where there were all kinds of buttons to be pressed and dorrs to be pulled. It was a bit crowded though. It was too getting too hot for the kids and for us as well. We walked past Cinderella's castle and sat down under the blue and yellow umbrellas across the water from Crystal Palace. AM had his blue cotton candy, IM took a nap, and GM bought some divine funnel cake with strawberries and cream (to die for). We recongregated and decided to leave the park with hopes of coming back to "finish" it later. (Famous last words!) Disney Day 1 was done.
Animal Kingdom was on the itinerary for day 2. We had booked the Donald Safari Breakfast at the Tusker House Restaurant. We met Goofy, Donald, Daisy, and Mickey in their safari costumes. Ate a lot of the Mickey Waffles and other yummy things... the Jungle Juice was exceptional. They kept refilling our glasses with that. With tummies full, we chilled out at the Kilimanjaro Safari... saw loads of animals. The kids had fun taking pictures. We walked around and took more pics in the park.. The Tree of Life was great. AM and IM cooled off in the Boneyard, where there were slides and things to climb on and a water area where AM had a lovely time getting wet. We went on the Triceratop Spin ride. Lunch was at Restaurantosaurus... I got a great veggie burger. Then we ran to catch the musical of Finding Nemo... great show! They did the whole fish and water effect really well on stage... the kids enjoyed the air conditioning and music and decided to take a nap. Meanwhile, there was a downpour of rain outside and our strollers got drenched :( We had to wait inside the theatre till the rain passed... then we ran to the Its tough to be a bug 3-D show... AM was petrified.. poor guy. He had his glasses off, ears closed and clung to me. All the rides were closing due to the rain... so we left.
Blizzard Beach proved to be great fun for the kids. It was a lovely hot sunny day, perfect for water park fun. The lazy river, Meltaway Bay, was where we started, then the wave pool and some nachos. GM and I each got to go on one slide. He went on the Tobbogan Racers and I went on the Double Dipper. Both were fun. Took the kids to Tike's Peak via the lazy river again. They had fun there in the little slides and fountains. Then it started to rain and they began closing all the rides... so it was time for us to leave... We had lunch and headed over to Downtown Disney.
Downtown Disney is full of shops and restaurants. Our destination was the Lego Imagination Center. Its the huge Lego shop where the kids went crazy! They couldn't decide what they wanted to buy. There is a wall full of little trays that have Lego peices, we get a cup to fill up with as many of the pieces as we can and buy that. We peeped into the huge World of Disney shop for a bit as well. But everyone was so tired that we went home..
Hollywood Studios was awesome. All of us were used to walking around in the sun by this time. And used to lines and rides and the general Disney parks routine. So we started with Playhouse Disney on Stage. Sat right up front... but the stage was too high up for the kids to actually see much. They had fun nevertheless. Then onto Toy Story Midway Mania. One of the BEST rides in Disney as of date. The line was long. almost an hour wait. But all worth it in the end. We put on 3-D glasses and had to shoot various targets in various games. AM and IM both seemd to love it. I totted up 48,200 points while GM got 63,200. Umm.. the highest of the day was around 222,000, so yeah, no match!! ;) Lunch was Pizza at Toy Story Pizza Planet. We saw Muppet Vision 3-D, that AM didn't really enjoy much. Strolled around a bit and then went to the Honey, I Shrunk the Kids Playground. They had a good time there with the huge Ant and Slides and stuff. Till it rained and they had to close the playground. So we had a snack, chips, juice and a brownie that had mickey shaped sprinkles! :) Luckily we just happened to come across the Monsters, Inc. Character Meet and Greet. Mike Wasowski (or Wa-house-key as IM insists on calling him) was there. AM posed with one eye closed for the picture with Mike. By the time RR and the rest sprinted to reach there, Mike had to leave BUT, it was time for Sully to show up... so we got the best of both. Had to leave then... but great memories captured.
Epcot was the longest time we spent in a park. Came in around 10:30am and left after the fireworks. The first thing we did is have the guys run ahead and get fast passes for Soarin'. Then started off with The Seas with Nemo and Friends: a nice ride through the aquarium, with special effects of Nemo and friends. They had fish tanks outside with real Nemo-like fish. It was cool. On to Turtle Talk with Crush. This was one of the coolest shows in Disney. There was Crush on a screen looking into the "Human Tank". He picked on RR to talk to!! "The dude in the front with the red shirt and dark noggin" It was sooooo coool!! He then spoke with the "parental unit" MR as well. Duuuuude, it was awwwwesome!! Then onto the Land, where we saw Living with the Land (slightly lame), ate at Sunshine Seasons, and then the company split. Us kiddies went to Innoventions West, made our versions of the Velcro froggies to take home. Sent GM to get fast passes for Mission Space. Looked around Innoventions West with the kids. Wanted to play the Piggy Bank Adventure, but two toddlers are a handful. GM took the Segway test drive just in time before we had to rush for Soarin'. There was still a 20 minute wait in the Fast Pass queue. MR and I stayed back with IM coz he's too short to ride. The others came out with such overjoyed faces and AM and RR were jumping around waiting to tell us what happened. It was the best ride they had sat in. So MR and I rushed in for our turn. Honestly, beautiful ride. They make you feel like you're flying in a hand glider over all these various places. They even simulate the smells. The orange orchards were amazing. Wow!! It was time for our Mission Space fast pass... so since IM was asleep, and AM agreed to stay with the Rs, GM and I ran all the way across to Mission Space for the Orange version of it (thats the more intense training program). They simulated shooting us into space and all the way to Mars. This was one awesome ride!!! Back to Innoventions West where the kids had made more frogs and played Piggy Bank Adventure. I got to ride the Segway this time!! Cool experience. One wonders who thinks of such gadgets! Then it was ice cream time at the Soda Fountain.... some yummy double scoops were had. :) MR and SR went for the Honey, I shrunk the Audience show which ended up having technical problems. In the meantime, I bought some pins to officially begin my Disney Pins collection. I have 6! Then The Journey into Imagination with Figment decided to shut the door on us as soon as we reached it. So we guessed it was time for dinner and the World Showcase. After aqcuiring some free masks at the Kidcot Fun Stop over in England, we reached Morocco's Tangarine Cafe and sat there with dinner till the IllumiNations began. Poor AM was petrified. We headed home, after a long, weary, yet the most fun day.
Typhoon Lagoon on our last day at Disney. It was sunny to start off with, but the clouds came on fast. The kids didn't show the same enthusiasm as in Blizzard Beach, as it was slightly cold for them. Castaway Creek, the lazy river, took us to Ketchakidee Creek, where there were small slides and fountains. AM and IM sat on little tubes and took a little ride, but only once. The Surf Pool with the 6-foot waves was a bit overwhelming for the kids. They refused to stay wet any longer. So we dried off, bought some hot mini donuts, met Stitch and we on our way out. Had lunch at Giordano's and headed to
Downtown Disney again. We walked around a bit this time. But eventually ended up spending almost 2 hours in the World of Disney store. It was huge. Bought our souvenirs, tried on hats, looked around a lot. Then we saw Ghirardeli's Soda Fountain and stopped for some ice cream. Massive sundaes and milkshakes were devoured. With this we bade goodbye to our short yet absolutely fantabulous trip to the magical world.
Places we ate at outside of Disney
UNO Chicago Grill
Panera Bread
Chevy's
Melting Pot
Cici's Pizza
IHOP
Chipotle
Olive Garden
Krispy Kreme
Giordano's
I think this post is already a lot longer than it should be.... and if you've gotten this far, you are brave. Thanks for listening.. :)
So this whole "Swine Flu" episode is a bit unsettling... Only 12 days left for our trip to the US.. and to some of the most crowded places, like Niagara falls and Disney World. They had a discussion on the radio this morning where they were wondering if Indians are stupid or brave to travel despite warnings of Swine Flu... Obviously people who have planned and paid don't seem to be cancelling their trips.. And as G rightly put it.. there are only about 700 confirmed cases of H1N1 in the world, while thousands of people are getting affected by malaria everyday... that doesn't stop us from going to the park?!
So I told the radio people...Kepping all this in mind, I'm going, of course. Tarana said "What should we do with you, Shachii?" but Jaggu defended me.. he said "..she's been planning for 9 months and has primed the kids so well, that if they don't go it'll be hell at home!"
I mean, come on! All this flu tracking is happening because of the technology and media.. And sometimes when these two work together, they can conjure up an epidemic out of thin air! Is anyone tracking the millions of malaria-carrying mosquitoes meandering menacingly and mercilessly around us and making many men miserable? (Sorry, I love alliteration!) And who is
tracking how many cases of yellow fever come from Africa? How do we know what viruses go undetected and travel across continents? Have faith, people! There's no point sitting at home and not exploring the world when you have the chance. I'm sure, whatever happens can be dealt with!
And, on May 3.."WHO advises no restriction of regular travel or closure of borders.It is considered prudent for people who are ill to delay international travel and for people developing symptoms following international travel to seek medical attention, in line with guidance from national authorities." and WHO knows!
G says, we'll have Tamiflu shakes!
And another good one: "They said that a black man would be President 'when pigs fly'.
Indeed 100 days into Obama’s Presidency …Swine flu !!"
So wish us luck.. and pray for our health and safety!
So, its Acting this time round for AM. His dad has convinced him that if he becomes an actor, then he gets to be anything he wants, a lawyer, a doctor, a policeman, anything... :)
But considering the stage fright at the Annual day today.... hmm... needs a lot of work!!
Labels: career choices, kids, parenting
So, AM has now decided that he wants to be a Policeman when he grows up.. no hang on.. what was that? Oh sorry... I meant he wants to be a Doctor when he grows up so he can give me an injection.. ah!
Two career-choices-of-the-day!
Labels: career choices, kids
I've decided to track the evolution in the choice of future career of my sons, AM (3 yrs 9 months) and IM (1 year 7 months). Since IM can barely speak yet, we'll begin to track his progress in a little while. But what inspired me to write this is the little talk AM and I had last night just before going to bed. He was asking me why one needs to go to school everyday. So the obvious answer to this was "Well, to become a better person, to study well and do something in life". I further went on to give him examples of how me, his dad and one of his grandpas were engineers, and one of his grannies was a teacher, the other a doctor and his other grandpa a lawyer, and how his aunt was studying so hard to become a lawyer... and so on and so forth. This led to a sudden lighting up on AM's face... I was trying to bore him to sleep.. but I guess the reaction was totally opposite to what I was hoping for. He was all chirpy again. I thought he'd say something like "When I grow up I want to be Ram/Laxman/Hanuman/Superman/Spiderman" or something to that effect considering his current obsession with Ramanyan. But, instead, and to my utter surprise, what he said was "When I grow up, I want to be a Lawyer!" He probably has no idea what/who a lawyer is...but hey.. this goes down in my book as career-choice-of-the-day.
Labels: career choices, kids
Happy New Year, folks! Last week has been a kind of revelation... nothing to be really proud of... a little disorientating, to put it mildly. Loads of things happened to make me feel that I'm, well... not that young... anymore. So I thought about it... and I have here my own list of the top ten (in no particular order) signs that you can look for, to determine whether or not you've had a reasonable amount of progress in terms of age..
- When most of the bottles and jars in your shower rack or dressing table have some version of the word "age-defying" on them.
- When the beauty parlor lady begins to plead with you to at least now, colour your "virgin head of hair".. and the top reason is not because it "improves your hair quality" or "makes your hair softer" but because it "will hide your greys for longer". (What!?!? I have grey hair?? I was in denial all this while I guess!!)
- When you suddenly feel that you're being stared at by one and all while you're browsing in the Misses section in the clothes department.
- When you think of the last ten parties you've been to and the list only includes birthdays of toddlers.
- When you find yourself checking a higher age-range while filling a form.
- When the list of your routine medical tests gets just a tad longer.
- When you hear from an old friend after a number of years which is greater than how many you believe you've been alive for!
- When you suddenly find that if a teenager is calling out to "Aunty..", its you they are referring to.
- When you meet your niece/nephew after a long time and you realise that she/he's not a teenager any more!
- When the bhaaji-wallah starts to address you as "Behen-ji" as opposed to the "Shishter" title you've gotten used to.
When I shared these thoughts with a few friends they definitely tried to make me feel better with words like "Yummy Mummy" and "still the same cartoon I knew five years ago" flying around... thanks, guys. Still I guess I will take a few days to get over this disconcerting feeling! My sons are being a great help though... I can really be a kid with them!! :) Its fun jumping around and yelling and singing like no one's watching... or listening. So here's to a new year full of happy things to look forward to. If you've got ears, say "Cheers!"
Have a great 2009!
Something unique I came across today. Disney is trying to sell me a trip to Disney World and this is how they promote it.
What a great idea!! :)
The following thoughts have been stimulated by the post, Cynic in Wonderland: Minding the Mind, by a friend.
Dear Cynic, all your hypotheses about the slowdown in one's intellectual growth are just fine. What you have not done, is consider external elements that tend to shake up the equilibrium. Let me illustrate. A perfect example of these external elements would be children. Well, you did briefly mention, in your third hypothesis, "real life, earning one’s livelihood, responsibilities" and children, I would say, become your prime responsibility. Combine this with "earning one's livelihood" and you've got yourself a highly combustible mixture. Suddenly you see yourself sliding back down the left side of the bell curve.
From devouring one cryptic crossword a day, suddenly you're down to five clues a month. From looking for intellectually challenging reads or New York Times bestsellers and the likes, suddenly you find yourself scanning the horizon for "Bruno learns to share" or "Pepper plays with fire" and other picture books with big letters. And, you know you've hit rock bottom when the only song you can think of to sing at the office picnic is "This old man, he played one...".
Then when you're slowly climbing back up the curve with the children, you realise that this is not the same route you took when you were growing up. The curve looks a lot different now, a lot steeper than you remember. And you find that your children have no trouble running up it, they've already reached way above you and calling out to you from the top, mocking you, as you struggle to keep up.
So, dear Cynic, think about this, and think hard because there's no turning back, no exit, no escape route, nothing... once you've gone in through this door.
Although, on the up side, if your inner child is still alive and kicking and wishes to stay that way, then these could end up being the best years of your life. In this case, you will find it just as exciting to plan a toddler-friendly trip to Disney World as you would a snorkeling trip to the Maldives. So the choice, dear friend, is all yours!
So, who are these guys?
Just random, young, lost souls that fall into the wrong sort of company?
I mean, what kind of brainwashing techniques do the head honchos use on these poor souls?
Must be something really strong and scientifically advanced... if you can be led to believe that you should kill all these innocent people to get to heaven! And if you can be led to believe that it is your God's command and that it is for Him that you must be prepared to kill others and yourself! Can't even begin to imagine the mental make-up of such people. Of the misleaders and the misled!
What can you do to try and stop someone who is so prepared to die?
What are they thinking?
Do they not have even a molecule of mercy in their hearts?
Why can't such kind of energy be channeled correctly and for good purposes?
Or, wait, is this a good purpose for them?
What is the end goal of these terrorists?
To rule the world?
Do they not see that they are a minority?
Have they not heard all the stories where the good guys always win?
Why do they bother?
Why can't they live and let live?
Or if they're so keen to die after all... then die and let live!
Where do they get all the money from?
Who finances their weapons and training camps?
Whats in it for these financiers?
Is it just some pocket change that they don't know what to do with?
Or are they true believers in the spread of fear and tragedy?
Why? Just because they have the power?
I'm sure there are good people who are more powerful than these guys. Where are they?
Why are they not financing some clean-up operations?
And why is everyone around me saying, "Oh well! There's nothing you can do about it!"?
I'm sure there is!
"Enough is enough... and enough is too much!" (- Popeye, I think.)
When everyone is cursing the politicos and how they don't do anything for the country ..blah blah blah, why should I keep my 20 paise to myself...
So, I think that the people governing this country are on an average, a bit too old. What kind of person does India want as a leader? Does India want a septu/octo-genarian, silver-haired person, with years of experience, but who can barely walk, or has a lullaby voice and reads his speeches as if he doesn't mean a word he says.
Wouldn't you rather have a face that is young, a face that is strong, a voice that is confident, speech that is vibrant and articulate and uplifting, a head that is always held high, a walk that is brisk and determined, a personality that exudes confidence and can represent a billion strong country all over the world? Would such a leader not give you a greater sense security?
I'm not saying that the experience of the octogenarians is not useful. It is! By all means, it is! But they should be among the advisers, they should be there backing up the ONE! That is why there is a ruling party and not a ruling person.
At least the following changes need to be implemented, according to me:
- Have a maximum age limit to hold such high offices.
- Keep a minimum educational qualification level to stand for elections (at any level).
- Do not allow anyone with even the smallest criminal record stand for elections for any office.
- Abolish sycophancy - everywhere!
- Make people aware. (yes, a very general statement)
- A lot of young people today are afraid to join politics. Why? Rope them in.
- Have transparency and accountability for every office in the government.
- Punish bribers and those who accept bribes
What the general public can try to do to improve their own quality of life and not curse politicians for:
- Keep their own surroundings clean
- Do not accept/offer bribes
- Understand the foreigners are not superior to us
- Get as much education as possible
- Do not give in to superstition
- Do not blindly follow people who claim to have extraordinary powers
- Keep a watch on people in your neighbourhood. Report suspicious activity
- Let your religion be Humanity (I borrowed this thought from a friend. Thanks, A.)
- Have a sense of responsibility for our country and its people (you're not just a drop in the ocean)
- Do random acts of kindness...every little gesture goes a long way
Look... the main issue with India is its number of people... every single problem boils down to this. So why not try to turn this problem to our advantage?
Labels: politics
Being a mother of two toddler boys, the past three and a half years have been a whirlwind of experiences, emotions, and activity. In today's modern India, any pregnant woman or new mother is inundated with free, often uninvited, advice from family, neighbours, friends, co-workers, the person next to you on the train, and anyone at all. I'm sure everyone means well, but it does tend to get to you after a while. I mean, you're already feeling all these new and different things and trying to deal with them, and on top of that you have to listen to all this from people. I'm not saying that one shouldn't be listening, some of this free advice does turn out to be very helpful in the end.
Things that I took note of and think are worth sharing... (yes, here I go with my free advice now... I'm one of THEM!)
- First and most important... NEVER let your mother (or anyone else) nag you!! Obviously she is more experienced in being a mother than you are! And obviously, she's done a great job at it! But hey, you live in a different world than she did when she was a new mom. I mean, you have your maternal instincts too. Also, there have been tons of medical advances since then, so what she faced during her delivery may not be like what you go through during yours. So listen to everything that she has to say, but think about it a little before you implement it.
- This is something that a very good friend, who also happens to be a paediatrician, told me.. She said "No matter what, enjoy your baby!" I was asking her all these questions about my new baby and why he behaved the way he did, etc. She told me that every baby is so different and that I shouldn't worry about it and make sure I enjoy every experience as far as possible. If the baby is cranky, you really will not know the reason why.. try different ways to comfort her, play it by ear, try to figure out what your baby likes best. It worked very well for me... She also told me to "sing to your baby, he will love it." I still do... I don't know if they like it, but they don't complain too much!!
- If you are happy, your baby will be happy. The baby can feel what you feel... so the time that you're tired, sleepy and irritated, that's the time that your baby is the crankiest! Its a rule!! Its really tough to be calm at such moments, but try.. have patience.
- NEVER EVER ever compare your baby with someone else's. And NEVER EVER let anyone else compare your baby with someone else's. So what if some random relative's baby started to talk when she was 9 months old, or was potty trained at 7 months!! Good for her! Your baby will probably know the alphabet backward by the time he's 15 months old.. who knows! Each baby takes their own time.. and they all come around eventually. My two sons are the exact opposite of each other. Its amazing how two children, who have the same parents and are growing up in the exact same environment, can be so different. The older one was saying words like "absolutely" and "Utkarsh", articulately, when he was 18 months old. The younger one is now 18 months and he barely says a few words like "Mummy", "Daddy", "Dada", etc.
- Take care of yourself. Make sure that you're strong enough to take care of your baby. Even if it means that you have to eat your dinner before anyone else, or eat more than anyone else.
- Try to spend some time for yourself. Its tough, but find an hour and go shopping.. or for a drive.. or for a coffee with a friend. It sure is very refreshing.
- Go back to work as soon as you can. People will tell you that you must spend all your time with your baby, or that your baby needs you more than anything, or that you are very selfish to be going back to work. Ask those same people to come back to you when in less than 6 years, your child will begin to go to school for a long time of the day, and want to spend more time with their friends than with you. What will you do then? Your career would have passed you by, your children will be old enough not to be completely dependent on you.. what then? Unless, of course, you have an alternative and can take a break for x years! I do know one lady (a very lucky lady) who went back to doing a full-time job after a long break (some 9-10 years). She is a rare example.
- The baby's father is a parent too... he has half the share of the baby, so he'd better share half the work with you. A lot of Indian daddies of today are very hands-on and involved with bringing up their babies (as they should be), but still a large number are not. Well... we know you work really hard all day, and you're tired and need rest to wake up and go back to work tomorrow, and all that... but hey... we work hard enough as well, we could do with a hand. She's as much your baby as she is mine. You'll probably end up missing all the best moments of being a parent! Its very important that daddies get used to washing the baby's bottom or feeding them. My husband will vouch for the fact that he has had some of the best experiences ever, as a completely hands-on dad.
I could go on about this!! But in closing, all I can say is that everyone's experiences are so different, and that I've been really, really lucky all these years!
Labels: motherhood, parenting
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